I have a lot of pattern pics stored on my computer in files with titles like "Doll Terror," "What's On Her Head?," "International Superspy" and "Dress of Evil" -- but one of the biggest categories by far is "Up To No Good." What is it about groups of women that suggest that they are, well, up to no good? Perhaps we all have memories of being the targets of mean girls in elementary school, junior high and high school. (Or was that just me?)
Say hello to just a few of the dastardly women of Patternland -- there are many more to come:
Don't tell me that the women in Simplicity 3559 aren't plotting! White Halter is beckoning with one pointed finger, while Stripes is enjoying the show. Flowers, however, clearly thinks they should have gone with her plan.
What is it about Pink's expression and body language in Simplicity 1181 that makes it seem like she's about to snatch the viewer's very soul away? Go ahead, White -- laugh, laugh, laugh!
McCall's 4535 is a tough one to categorize -- clearly Yellow and Print Dress are conspiring about something. But the sunglasses and big hats give this a dose of International Superspy as well. My theory is White just handed off that purse to Print Dress. Expect a high-speed scooter chase to follow.
"But what about the children?!," you cry. Rest assured, it's not all innocence and light there, either -- check out McCall's 3228:
This one puzzled me for a while, but I think I finally figured it out. Blue Suit Boy is exhibiting Carrie/Firestarter-like psychic powers and wreaking devastation -- perhaps on us! Red Skirt is fascinated by him, while all the other kids are laughing at our coming demise. Quick, look away!
Finally, McCall's 3722 -- or, as I prefer to call it, "Caught In The Act:"
Have you ever seen such a blatant example of "Who, me? I'm not doing anything!" It's the equivalent of hitting Microsoft Word to cover up your solitaire game when the boss walks by -- everyone is pretending nothing is going on. Even the poodle is in on it!