"...I think that stripes has the golf club as protection from squinty eyed white pajama man. There is obviously something sinister about white pajama man's book. Perhaps it is a manual on how to take over the world, and Stripes' golf club is the only thing that can stop it! Perhaps the golf club is a Bond-esque weapon that will stop White Pajama man from enacting his nefarious plan!... The golf club blends in for camouflage! So when Stripes attacks to stop Squinty-eyed White Pajama Man, he won't know where it's coming from!"
Bratling, the pattern is yours! Just email me your address (my email is at the upper left) and Stripes and Squinty will come home to you.